Bitching About 'Bitch'

If you're looking for a name for a high-end dog salon, you could do a lot worse than 'High Maintenance Bitch,' which has the advantage of being both cheeky and memorable. But even in cosmopolitan Seattle, such a name promptly brings out the neighborhood scolds.

[T]he store has drawn the ire of some Wallingford residents who dislike the sign that hangs outside the company's flagship boutique. "I am probably the most progressive liberal person in the world and I am personally offended by the sign," said Janet Stillman, executive director of the Wallingford Neighborhood Office. "It's so blatant and so in your face. ... Walk by there with your 5-year-old and try to explain why that sign is there." ... Stillman fears that the sign will ruin family photos of the summer parade.

In the Seattle Post-Intelligencer photo, the sign looks to be about three by three feet. The slightest tilt of a reveler's camera will literally keep it out of the picture.

As for the five-year-old, it's surely neither beyond most parents' linguistic grasp nor their pedagogical capability to explain that 'bitch' is a perfectly fine, non-pejorative English word that means female dog, which is exactly the context here.

Stillman is the world's "most progressive liberal person" in the same way that O.J. Simpson is the world's most loving husband. She perfectly fits the mold of the pursed-lipped church lady who blanches at the common synonym for 'rooster,' and who always felt a bit miffed that the alphabet contains such vulgarities as the letter P.

Luckily, the city of Seattle is effectively telling Stillman and her posse (calm down Janet, I said posse) to stuff it.

To ban the sign would be a violation of free speech, said Alan Justad, spokesman for the city of Seattle's Department of Planning and Development. The city regulates size and placement, but not language, he said.

Quite. Ah, wouldn't it be nice if officials had such a baseline commitment to free speech at the state level?

Comments

[K. Dale Boley]

My guess is not that she is the church lady so much. It's just that this one hits home. Ask her husband, she's probably a High Maintenance Bitch.

[Dakota]

I used to live about 6 blocks from the highend dog bakery, yes dog bakery, and salon/spa "Doggie Style".

In all places Washington DC. Take that you pent up, stoggy left coasters.

http://www.doggiestylebakery.com/

[David]

"Walk by there with your 5-year-old and try to explain why that sign is there."

That's quite a streak this week, Rog. We should name February the official "laws I want passed because I'm too embarrassed to talk to my kids" month.

Seriously, what's so hard for these people about telling a five year old that bitch is the term for a female dog? Or that plastic nuts on the back of truck means there's a redneck inside?

[TJ]

Geez!!! Is there no end to these wacky people? We should sentence them to 1 year reading the Olde English Dictionary.

And, if you are unable to explain female dog [is it the dog part? or the female part? ;) ], then perhaps you shouldn't have had kids, yes?