Is Dutch Queen Beatrix a Whore?

Queen Beatrix of the Netherlands has long been known to turn tricks on the lawns of her multiple palaces, orally servicing any constituent who'd like a little royal head.

Actually, I don't know that for sure. I do know that it's a throwback to a very dark, very feudal age to suddenly enforce a long-dormant law against insulting the monarch.

For years it's seemed as though there were no limits when it came to ridiculing the royal family. But those times now appear to be over. This week, a homeless man in Amsterdam was convicted of insulting the monarchy after calling Queen Beatrix 'a whore'. On Tuesday, a journalist was arrested for wearing a t-shirt with the same text on it. Suddenly, insulting the monarch is a top priority in the Dutch justice department. Insulting the monarch has been a crime ever since 1881. There is a set five-year prison sentence for affronting the head of state. But the law has been virtually out of commission since the 1960s.

That there's a law giving special rights to blueblooded, parasitic, do-nothing, unelected officials is laughable (although claiming such privileges, including the right to steal and take bribes, has long been a strong suit of the Dutch royals and their enablers).

But just as cringe-inducing is the handiwork of the journalist who used a felt marker to scrawl the offending words about the queen on a T-shirt. I mean, look at that news picture — no fashion sense whatsoever.

So I spent 30 minutes slapping together a somewhat more stylish design.

This T-shirt isn't actually in production (the picture is just a quick mock-up), but if there is sufficient interest, I'll gladly order up a batch. E-mail me if you're Dutch and you want one. I'll sell it at cost to all cummers comers.

And just because I'm feeling generous, I'm going to send the queen an exclusive, one-of-a-kind thong (right), accompanied by a nice letter in which I'll be reminiscing about the time when freedom of speech actually meant something in the Netherlands.

As for the T-shirt, sure, you might get in trouble with the law if you're the only one wearing it. But imagine there are multitudes of people sporting the same shirt (or similar ones) out in the open, and see how fast the state prosecutors will find more productive things to do with their time and your tax money.

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UPDATE: Added the Dutch version, below. By the way, if you're an American and you have friends who'll be visiting the Netherlands, please teach them that "Which way to the Van Gogh Museum?" is, in Dutch, KOH-NINGIN BEATRIX ISS UN HOOR." Believe me, you'll all laugh about it later, after that whole bail thing is taken care of.

Comments

[Phil Nelson]

Aw. Look how happy 'lil spermy is.

[Corné]

Maybe You should change the text in "I think "Beatrix is a whore" " or "In MY OPINION is Beatrix a Whore (of in het NL: Ik denk "Bea is een hoer" of "Na mijn mening is Bea een hoer" o.i.d.) We are allowed to say someting like that to a policeman "Ik vind jou een eikel"

It is not MY opinion, but my/our Freedom of expression is very important.

[max]

Maybe you should call your girlfriend a Whore. See what the effect is of free speech.

[Robin]

Wat een onzin! Laat het koninklijk huis lekker met rust, ze doen alleen maar goede dingen, neem Maxima en Alexander, werken keihard, watermanegement in de hele wereld, Maxima met wereldwijde mini ondernemers enz. Noem hun (schoon)moeder een hoer?? Wat is het voordeel hiervan? Neukt ze voor geld? Want dat is toch de definitie van een hoer/prostituee? Er is genoeg in Nederland om kritiek op te hebben maar laat ondernemende eerlijke mensen met rust!

[Oranje]

Ben het helemaal eens met Max! Daarbij wordt er over lijken gegaan onder het mom van 'vrijheid voor meningsuiting'. Mijn advies aan jou in goed engels: GROW UP! Eikel!

[milosz]

wat ontzettend kinderachtig dit. wordt volwassen zeg.

[Marco]

Tjonge jonge jonge. wat een stoere knul ben jij zeg. mijn neefje van 12 heeft meer volwassenheid in zijn pink dan jij in je hele leijer. moest je zonodig punten scoren bij je A-Westerse vriendjes of die stinkende YANKEN. die denken dat de hele wereld van hen is.

Ik ben Nederlander en trots op mijn Koningin.

p.s. het is geen vrije meningsuiting het is vrijheid van meningsuiting. je kent niet eens je eigen grondrecht.[lul]

[marco]

de post van milosz Friday, august 03, 2007 at 03:32 am is van marco. i.p.v. milosz

[yuri]

Rogier van Bakel, nee, jij bent toonbeeld van Hollandse sier. Naar mannetje. Hoop dat dit je voor een hele lange tijd negatief blijft achtervolgen, oetlul.

[Kees de Roos]

If the queen feels that she should take the bearer of the shirt to court, she should do so. That the government takes action "on her behalf" is stupid and contraproductive. If someone feels that he or she has to insult the queen, let him or her and react normally.

[Klaas]

Een land waar men alles maar moet kunnen zeggen onder het motto vrijheid van meningsuiting. Wat vervolgens over gaat in het beledigen van....Dan maar liever wat minder vrijheid zodat de rechter de goede smaak maar moet handhaven.
P.S. zijn er veel Nederlandse vrouwen van boven de 65 die zo hard werken voor het vaderland. Rogier, als het je hier niet aanstaat flikker dan toch lekker op.

[miche]

Although your article disrespects the fine taxpaying whores (by that I acknowledge that they are whores in a much bigger way than their jobs) I know in Amsterdam, I wish to point out that Cafe Press can do your shirts up cheaply.

Shoot me an email- I'll buy the first shirt.

[Erik]

Wat ben jij zielig zeg. Flikker toch lekker op. als de koningin je niet aan staat.

[Selwyn]

Je kunt ervan afkomen hoor, meld je bij de GGZ even aan voor cognitieve gedragstherapie. Zij leren je omgaan met je frustratie en je tekortkomingen. Jij vindt dat je zomaar alles kunt zeggen! Ik voor één keer ook, ik zal een aantal weblogs onderkalken met: Rogier van Bakel is een pedo, hij doet het met kleine meisje. Moet kunne hoor, is vrijheid van meningsuiting!

Ik hoop dat je hiervoor vervolgt gaat worden en dat je baas je ontslaat, en vraag geen uitkering aan want je hebt geen respect voor je eigen land.

[Nut44x4]

LMAO KLAAS!!! YOU ROCK!!!

je bend zelf hoer van je moeder

[James]

Well this just confirms that holland is a fascist state. No freedom of speech. Have to carry around your "papers" everywhere you go. The Nazis just moved west.

[Peter Bosse]

Come on grow up, you might noy know that if Beatrix could be elected she will win the elections!
You never tried to undersatnd the Dutch culture and history, free speech? well you got your 15 days of fame, so my advise to you is to change your dipers and get a life!

Go and see what the royals are doing and what kind of a possitive effects it has on the world, than you, soon i hope, sing a different song.

Calling the Dutch Nazis and fascist state?
Please go back to the dirty hole you came from....

[raven]

beatrix is a traitor to the Netherlands.Heading the secretive Bilderberg society whose main agenda is to depopulate 80% of the world population is grounds alone to burn the castles to the ground and imprison all the nazis in the monarchy and government. The corporate demon clones and main stream media spineless jellyfish will soon realize a paycheck was not worth it when the fiat currency of the world banks collaspes. The Dutch monarchy ran away to Canada the last time their friends the nazis came for a visit. Good thing the pussy puppet government there are Bilderberg members also.The new world order is working with stealth to make sure their evil empire takes over and we the slaves are eliminated.
See ENDGAME. We must work together to abolish all monarchies,rogue government and msm. The vatican's satanism must be exposed and the dirty greedy banksters also must be held accountable for 100s of years of deceit just for starters they always fund both sides of the war.More people need to learn the truth before it's too late.
Peace

[Desmond Lynham]

De hatelijke reacties geven je gelijk. Heel grappig dat je vrijheid van meningsuiting propageert en daar zulke reacties op krijgt: owned!

bea stoep hoer nr1

bea bilderberg slet

[Valyn]

i'll buy one right now